faced with fear

i have always been a big fan of the water but i NEVER had an inkling of a want to scuba dive. when planning the big trip to oz one of the major expeditions for my travel companions was to scuba dive the great barrier reef. for me, a person who had never snorkelled before, i couldn't understood why. as a kid, i hated my swimming lessons~ back and forth, back and forth throughout the length of the pool. why would i want to do that underwater?

here is the story of my first open water dive:

the day before
tense
couldn't speak
silent.
when spoken too i would break into tears
too much anxiety/pressure/everything!
secretly hoped/wished/willed that i would be unable to go
wanting to fail the medical
get stuck in another place
sleep in
but to no avail.
i was on the boat!

our first dive,
put air in my pfd
put the regulator in my mouth
jumped
let out the air out of my pfd
my body would not go underwater.
i willed it not to
definite hypervenilation
underwater now
i took a breath
then two
three, four, and many after!
it was okay
fantastic
fell in love

JAWS: the clownfish

their home

okay so this is not real although we did see a shark but it was night, so picture is unavailable. looks pretty realistic though hey???