Sickness

So I got sick. It was a few weeks ago. And never had I felt like that before. Some kind of stomach flu. But when I googled stomach flu it actually came up that there was no such thing. But I think that is the best descriptor for most to understand what was happening. 

It was also the first time that I had to call in sick without giving a bit of notice. And I felt horrible. Two am sick calls on a weekend. I know I was sick, blah blah blah. But it's okay to feel bad for the people that are going to be working that shift right? (Wink, wink). Thankfully the charge that I talked to was so understanding and nice about it that I didn't worry. 

Now that I am over the sickness and can actually look at perogies now, he he. I have to give a big appreciation shout out to my partner. I can sometimes be (a little) unsympathetic to his blights of illness...poor thing. But as I rolled down the stairs the next morning half, sleep, with chills going up my back and extreme pain jabbing me from all sides he took care of me. 

He went to the store and bought me five different flavored Gatorade drinks to boost up my hydration and electrolytes. He made me chicken broth and rice to eat. He let me be as I slept on and off the day. And at night when the pain still wouldn't go away and I was still experiencing "chills" he went out again to buy me Tylenol, allowing me to sleep 11 straight hours that night and morning. 

He's a good man. I could learn a lot from him. Ha ha ha. 

Love

Two wolves

So I mentioned before that I was reading the book "Prime," by Ariana Huffington. Lots of valuable thoughts and stories in it that I am going to attempt to practice in the coming months...hopefully years! Blog on some of those things in later posts. 

But one story that I loved loved loved was this one! I had to search for it immediately after. Such a wonderful lesson! Hope you enjoy! 

A Native America Indian legend

Two wolves

An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. He told him of the battle that goes on inside people. 

“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, jealousy, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” 

He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Love

whoopsie!

Bringing in May with a whoops....so I actually made a few posts at the end of April. But it looks like I forgot to publish them....so enjoy.

AND...

Happy May 1. Spring is upon us. Let's enjoy!

love

Bentley

We got a dog. And I kind of love him. I am surprised at the amount of affection I have for this giant beast of a dog. He is cute. And big. He is affectionate. And big. He is cuddly. And big. He is friendly....and did I mention he is big!

I have been wanting a dog for a couple of months. Mark always expressed a want for a rescue dog so I have been perusing the website looking at the perfect fit for our family. Cat friendly, bathroom trained and additional training is a bonus. Kid friendly as we have friends, with little ones. It was a tough criteria as I looked at all the cute dogs that just wouldn't work. 

But then we found him. Bentley. Two years old. Black lab and oh so nice. When I first saw him he was cute. Mark loved him right off the bat. I thought, this could work. I was cautiously attached. But then I found myself looking forward to coming home from work. Looking forward to going for walks. Looking forward to tossing the ball and playing with him. That's right. He's got me wrapped around his paw. I kind of love the big guy. 

 

So now we have a dog. And he is big. 

Love

Moments that make me smile

I am watching Jurassic Park right now. You know that scene in that movie. The pivotal scary moment where you just hear the foot on the ground. 'Thump, thump, thump'. You get chills up your spine. The danger is coming. The water in the puddle is vibrating rhythmically to the sound of the 'thump, thump thump.'

That moment always makes me laugh. Always. I think of Jeaninne. We were on a plane boarded to Italy for a school trip. We were overtired and hysterical. Committed to not sleeping. Joking around. Playing games and talking. The flight attendant came around and brought us water. Setting it down on our trays, it rippled in accordance to the plane's engine. Jeaninne quickly quipped, 'It's coming!'  Mimicking the movie, Jurassic Park. 

Still to this day when I see the water vibrate in the puddle and hear the 'thump thump thump,' I am brought back to that plane ride. Our seventeen year old selves laughing and giggling in that moment. 

I love that moment. 

Love

The tides are a changing

How does one find happiness?

These long winter months, (yes I continue to say that as the snow trickles down) have been a challenge to find just that. What makes me happy? Being housebound, with the never ending snow can be more than a little depressing. Not that I was always housebound. But if you read a few posts prior to this you will understand that one of my enjoyments (working out and the gym) was a little side tracked with a knee injury. Blah. 

So I needed to get to the root of the problem. Why was I so unhappy? Sure weather played an impact. Sometimes the feel of sun, warmth and light is revitalizing. Seriously. Cheesy maybe for some. But we have had glimpses of it during this periodic snowfall (seriously, poor Canada this winter) and it has been fantastic. Feeling more energetic just uplifts the mood. 

I wasn't the only one that felt the winter blues. Talking to a few friends and family and the lack of sun has soured many. This forced my partner, and my parents to make a pact for next spring break. Sunshine is in our future and we are going to seek it out no matter what. 

Weather wasn't the only thing that impacted my mood. I took on an incredible opportunity to work in a casual job on top of my current position. I was happy to get the job but I was working my 3 jobs more than I personally wanted to. 

I didn't realize it at the time, but it was impacting my mood at home. Increasingly grumpy, tired as my get away from work became chores, errands and sleep. I missed my friends. I missed talking to my family. And I missed my partner. In particular I missed happy times with my partner. It seems unhappiness spreads. When one is sad and miserable the other tends to get to be the same. Doesn't make for a happy household. 

However good things come out from this. Family are ever so encouraging. They had my back no matter what. Put a smile on my face. Listened to my fears. Loved me. Friends were the same. And don't dismiss my partner. We learned different ways to communicate and to continue on, growing further in our relationship. 

The next descison was a particular hard one. But I decided to leave my current job and delve into the casual one over the summer. It is something that I am interested in and why I chose my current career. I am excited at the opportunity for learning, and growth. 

But I have to say I am so thankful to have been given the opportunity to work in the hospital that I did. I learned so much and met some incredible people. I learned the essence of teamwork. I learned how to deliver safe, effective patient care while maintaining my integrity and compassion. I really couldn't have asked for more. But after a year and a bit. I am ready to move on. 

So the tides are a changing. And it scares me but truthfully I have a sense of immeasurable relief and glimmers of happiness. This last year happiness has not always been easily achieved. Something hard to write about on a blog about happiness. But maybe it's not suppose to be easy! 

Presently I am reading 'Prime' by Ariana Huffington. She said something that impacted my present quest. Happiness takes practice. Making an effort to be happy, finding mindfulness and seeking out simple pleasures can help ones own emotional well being. So I am going back to the beginning. Some of these things will be shared on my blog. Others in my life. But let's just say I am excited at the new prospects my life will bring.  

Love

Corn starch

I was cooking today and I grabbed the corn starch from the top shelf of the cupboard. And then I smiled. I thought of a moment not so long ago. With my parents.  At the end of December. 

Dad was making fun of my paper towel holder and how it takes so much space in the cupboard (it's one of the ones that hooks on top of the cupboard and hides your paper towels inside the cupboard). I told him he was wrong. He proceeded to tell me he could keep 2lbs of chocolate chips in his cupboard. Not to be outdone, I pulled open mine to show him my big bag of chocolate chips when....

Poof. Corn starch comes tumbling down. Poof again! It powders me, the counter, the cupboards, the floor, the sink....everywhere!

Dad took one look and was hysterical. Zingers coming out as I proclaimed, "mom placed the corn starch there." "It's a little persons trap," he replied. As I moved from my spot, he laughed harder noting the corn starch markings on the floor, outlining a person, just like police tape. Between fits of laughter he called my mother who came in denying my accusations (she is probably right) and at the same time grabbing her camera to take pictures like I am a celebrity and she is the paparazzi. 

I gasped, "I am going to go have a shower". Dad quipped, "Be careful. You may not be able to move after." 

That is what I am reminded of today with that box of corn starch, right by my paper towels.  Dad still stands by his opinion of my paper towel holder. And I still stand by mine. But I could be wrong on that too. At least a funny story came from it. And I will forever be reminded. 

Love

Olympics....I won't be seeing you anytime soon

So it turns out I am not an olympic skier. Shocking I know. 

I think the first clue would have been when I took a look at my ski jacket. The last ski pass on there was Fernie 2010. Whatever. I am a champ. I can conquer any mountain. I am a pretty good skier. I mean I have been doing it since I was 8. 

The next clue may have been that I thought about the last time I sharpened my skis. It probably wasn't good that I don't remember. But whatever. Sharpened skis don't mean anything.

Then it was overcast. And I couldn't really see in front of me. And my googles started to fog. Then ice. But who needs googles anyway? And my legs know skis. It's in my blood. He he. Okay so three things aren't looking good. 

I actually started to feel sick as it felt like a scary ride of bumps that could only be stopped by me. But I couldn't stop as how do you get off the top of the mountain without going down? Solution? Go to the other mountain. 

Eureka! No overcast. Gorgeous conditions. Two runs in. I am feeling great. Sickeness gone. Skiing up a storm. Look over at my partner. Wow. He is a great skier too. We are awesome. Who needs to sit and watch the Olympics, when you can perform like an Olympian in life?

Run three. Go in for the first turn. No edge in the ice. Slip, head first down the hill. Clunk your head. Oww. Skis stay on as you slide head first. You manage to stop. You get up. Shake it off. Your partner comes to your aid. You feel okay and proceed to ski down. Then something doesn't feel right in your one leg. You turn just a little...and ow. 

Okay time for the ski out. No biggie. Will try harder tomorrow. Grumble a little bit (or maybe a lot). Sit down for a lovely dinner. Get up to leave. Ooooooo dear. This leg is really hard to move now. "I think it's best we head home tomorrow, maybe we will go back in a month". 

He he. Now time to ice ice ice. Watching the Olympics isn't that bad. 

Love

Happy family day.

I love my family. I have said this many times over. And I think I have expressed this on this blog many times over as well. Well let's talk about my small little family as well. That would be my husband. And let's talk about his views.

Family is very important to him. Many think it is me, but I think he plays sometimes a bigger role influencing my view on family, than I on him. Or maybe we just enhance each other's? 

When I talk about visiting my parents he is the first to say do it. No questions asked. He actually will encourage it on times when I don't think to go. It's like he senses I need my mom and dad. He gets along with my brother too. I see so much endless support when it comes to those two. He was extraordinary when my brother broke his leg and has been a good head to lean on with more personal matters this year. 

Of course it's not just my family either. If his parents call for a favor, his usual reply is what time and when, without question. He adores them, a quality that is always nice to see in your partner. He makes himself available at important family events, helps host, asks what needs to be done and is there to do it. Calls his brother to check up on him. When it rained on his sisters wedding he drove the morning of to pick up umbrellas. And loves playing uncle to his little nephew. 

I think as you grow up in your family, you love them but you are always hanging out with the parents who embarass you and the little brother who bugs you all the time. Then you reach a point where that doesn't happen anymore. 

You realize your parents aren't embarrassing they are really interesting. And your siblings are pretty cool in their own right. You gain a greater appreciation of them and cherish the moments you have with them.  Let's face it. You want to spend time with them! Maybe even making memories that are to be treasured more. 

That's what my little family has taught me. It's been a fun journey so far with my little family. And hopefully the memories with our little family continue to grow with laughter and love and experience.  And with our bigger families too!

Happy family day!

Love

Oh canada

I kind of love you. You are a fabulous country. There is so much to do around you. You have wonderful parks. You have fantastic aspects of nature. And you have amazing people. I am sorry I don't say that I appreciate you more often. You really should be thanked more.

Every two years I feel a great pride for you. I see people that belong to your country show acts of kindness, athleticism, pride and joy. Funny thing is this happens on a daily occurrence in our country. And not just in sports. But to see it on a international stage just makes me proud.

I love that we have people that will forfeit their opportunity in a race for the better person. And that person medal. I love that another will come to the aid of another country so that they can finish the race. I love seeing two sisters hold hands while on the podium. And I love that our passports open a beer fridge! And I loved this article as it made me laugh as I felt more pride. Because we can be good and can win at times too. Not always the most important in my eyes but nice!

The Olympics does something for me. I normally don't care about sports. But speedskating, figure skating and yes even hockey is on constant stream in our home. I find my self watching snowboard competitions with fascination and with one eye open I will catch the skeleton and luge. I FaceTime my mother and we watch and comment on the Olympics together. Seeing if we can out do each other with the latest olympic gossip, trivia or unknown fact. 

Oh olympics. I have had such fun times. Calgary 88 my great Aunt Elizabeth came down as we saw Elizabeth Manley skate to silver. I vowed I would be her...for two years. Barcelona, 92, I was tumbling around the basement practicing layouts and back handsprings, perfecting my splits just like Shannon Miller. Lillehammer, 94, I watched my dad quote Jean-Luc Brassard, "I love to fly" in his gold medal win. In Atlanta 96 I was home alone for two weeks (for the first time) as I screamed and laughed to Donovan Bailey winning the gold in the 100 m sprint. So many memories. 

Cut to spending Valentines Day with Mark in 2010 watching Vancouver in a small mountain town at Boston Pizza...eating a heart shaped pizza no less and seeing Alex Bilodeau hug his brother after his gold medal win. His brother, having cerebral palsy, touched my heart about how great this win was for him and his family. And I have great fondness for London 2012 as we honeymooned and watched Jamaica win the 100 m sprint with Usian Bolt. 

Canada and the Olympics you have brought me and my family together. You have made me feel proud. And I kind of love you!

Love

Good friend

I got to spend today with three of my favourite people in the whole world. Two are small and cute and one is a girl i really could not live without. That's right little P, baby M and my favourite redhead (non related...although we still question that), Jeaninne.

Quite a nice afternoon. It was a short visit. Jeaninne was taking the girls to west ed and I had to get some errands done as I am going to be working a long stretch starting tomorrow. So we met up and I went to the under water aquarium with them. Touched the stingrays, anemones, and starfish with little P. Watched the sharks eat, along with the sea turtles. And even saw some nemos!  Lovely short visit. 

It got me thinking about my friends. I am truly blessed. I probably have some of the best girlfriends around. I will talk about others later but just a little glimpse at Jeaninne. 

One of the greatest things about this girl is ability to be happy and joyful about all those around her. She is never spiteful. She is honest and always there to listen and encourage. And she is so genuinely happy for all her friends milestones and events. She is probably the most empathetic person I know. She hates that she can be emotional at times and cares so much. I think that is one of her greatest gifts. 

I remember when I got engaged. I think she was more excited than I was (and I was pretty excited). And I can't even go into how involved she became in the wedding, amazing. She was slideshow coordinator, house host, provided car rental, and just all around there. 

I am just so happy she is in my life. I don't ever want to take that friendship for granted. 

Just grateful. 

Love

A little Christmas in February.

I cannot get over that it is February already. Where has the time gone? It had gone from hot to cold from warm to down right freezing today. I hate it when the weather does that. I start to get a little to hopeful that maybe, just maybe, spring will come a little earlier than normal. He he. 

But this was a nice surprise in this crazy weather. I let my amaryllis continue to grow this year and cut off the dead stems and what did I get. A bigger and taller one than the initial flower that came. Sure is pretty!

Love

With love from my husband

"Just a heads up to all potential visitors to the house, Tracey did get onesie pajamas and is accosting anyone who comes near so that they can truly appreciate her eminence wrapped within its all encompassing heart speckled folds. Be prepared, ninja fighting moves should be expected from Tracey on sight, standard operating procedures dictate that no one must ever lose to Tracey's low flying kicks and high flying punches," Mark warns. 

Tracey adds, "plus it makes me happy everything I put it on". 

Love

One year ago

Right about now I was a mad woman. Sure there are always spurts of madness in my life (wink, wink). But literally I was a mad woman. I was studying crazily for the crne, convincing myself of ultimate doom. I was half heartedly applying for jobs as I didn't want to go through the interview process adding unnecessary stress to the exam process...not realizing that when no calls came back it added to my stress.

Ahhhhhh. Yes well if I could have just talked to myself then. Although knowing me I wouldn't believe her. I wrote the exam and passed! I got together with all my nursling friends (after the exam) to find out many didn't have jobs. I talked with friends about revamping my resume and did. And I got an interview and then a job in mid march. 

I started working. And working more and although there have been some trials being a new grad there have been happy moments. I have found excellent support and friends. I have learned so much on the last year and I have even managed to teach others what I know, who knew? 

Now I am about to start another career venture. I am going back to the job I had during my preceptorship. As a nurse, not a student. I am nervous, scared and excited about this new venture. It's a little step in a direction I am passionate about. Loads of learning to be had. But I am ready. 

What a difference a year makes!

Love

What it's like to be a nurse

After almost a year of working I am starting to formulate what I feel it's like to be a nurse and what it's like to work with others

Nurses are kind to each other and to others.

For a profession that the majority tends to be women I feel we break the stigma associated with females working with females. We work together. We look to solve problems. We focus on communicating our patients needs to the appropriate disciplines. And most importantly we are there for each other so we can be there for our patients.

Nurses break the stigma of the traditional nurse

Let's not exclude our male counterparts in nursing who are great as well. Like any profession I welcome equality and love the different perspectives each individual can bring. I like a lot of people I work with. Frankly a huge lot of them are amazing. Each have their own way of doing things, have their own personality and their own set of skills and knowledge. Yet we all hold similar values in caring for our patient, even if it looks a bit different in each other's eyes.

Nurses are there for you

When things look bad and frankly overwhelming, I call on my fellow coworkers for help. And guess what. They come willingly, offering anything and everything they can.

Sometimes things don't look well for patients. They take a decline in health. I press a button and people come running. It's miraculous to watch a collective, coming together to help you, and more importantly that one person in the bedside that needs all of our help. It's so fluid to watch. Some may say its fast and adrenaline pumping. I see it in slow motion, so fluid, almost dance like, as one documents, another does vitals, another takes orders, another administers. It's amazing.

I know of one in particular who helped me so much this week. She worked at the desk. A charge nurse. But she didn't stay at the desk. She was a true team player manning the floor when she was needed and able. A true and remarkable leader who cared about her coworkers and the patients. I am always amazed when I see people like her. True leaders who probably could move up the ladder quite easily, but selfishly I want them by my side.

Nurses are great to talk to you

They are by your side and on your side. I have cried with patients. Supported them by being their cheerleaders. I have listened and empathized. And I felt I ultimately care and want everyone to get better.

And guess what. I have done the same with my coworkers, and they for me. One nurse went into a patients rooms and found her declining quite bad. Once recovered, she then said, "what if I hadn't gone in there to help her, would she have died?" I told her, that is the wrong statement, "it's that you went in there and she lived". So often we beat each other up for the potential of what coulda, shoulda, woulda. Instead of looking at the what we had done, did and will do for them (my husband taught me that one).

There have been many days I have bottled up my feelings and cried all the way home, reaching my husband at that point I am almost inconsolable. It's not pretty. But these last two months, I have started to talk to my nursing coworkers. And guess what. They have been not only amazing in their support for me, but showed me what it is truly like to be part of a team. They have encouraged me, offered hugs, and offered opportunities in reflection. I don't think I could do the work I do without them.

Nurses aren't the only ones that are amazing.

When in the hospital you encounter a variety of different titles. Physicians, OTs, PTs, RTs, speech pathologists, pharmacists, lab techs, diagnostics, food services, dietitians, social workers, etc. I work with them and without them we would be rendered useless. But I work closely with my partner usually liscnsed practical nurse and on occasion an RN, who I have talked about already. But two very important roles that I really don't think it gets enough recognition but deserves are these.

First, The health care aide. They, too, talk to our patients, help bathe them, reposition them, help feed them if we are busy with the medical aspect. They help us with the extra tlc that is needed like a warm blanket, new water. But more importantly they care. Sometimes they see things when our eyes are on others. They are so important and so needed in our team. We would be so horribly overwhelmed without them.

Second the unit clerk. The people with the answers. They process our stat orders, call our codes, ring up the numbers by memory in an emergency, make sure our patients get to their tests, get discharged properly, get admitted properly, have the correct diets and really so much more. They have so much knowledge it's incredible. I couldn't figure where a persons ahs card could be when they got admitted and one unit clerk had it figured out in mere seconds. 

So ultimately I think I have learned how important it is to be part of a team in nursing. People thrive when we all work together. And we thrive when we work together. Teamwork should be encouraged and fostered. Never take it for granted and do anything and everything to keep that team functioning in a positive way. It's worth it.

Love

7 year itch?

Happy 7 years to my beloved.

What can I say that I haven't said already. 

I had a conversation with you the other day and there was an overwhelming feeling of contentment and near perfection. We talked about our day.  So ordinary, I know. But after, I felt we really are a family. 

We were both talking about some very difficult things re. work. As we talked we felt sad re. each of our situations. Questioning. But simulataneously, we found some aspect of positivity for each other.  Things that we both needed to keep going. Our jobs can be quite difficult and stressful, so we are lucky to have each other for this. I thanked you then and I thank you now. 

We laugh, find humor and positivity. That is so important in life. We have encountered many people, in many walks of life. Some people seem to have a really tough go. They have unfortunate circumstances that they have yet to be able to turn around. Or they just need a little boost to help them and it can't be immediate which is what they need. Sometimes others are unable to ask for help, or others feel they don't need it when they plainly do. 

I think that you and me are lucky as we do try to find an answer to solve our problems and to keep going. We support each other, love each other and are ultimately there for each other.

So seven year itch? It looks pretty fab if this is what seven years is. 

Happy anniversary. 

Love

The parents have gone home

The parents are gone and this house has gotten a little extra lonely for us all. I think even Kitty misses some extra cuddles, 'wink, wink'. It was nice having people around. Especially when I worked evenings as my life gets pretty quiet during those days being as the only people I see are at work. 

But I shall be fine. I have already started a work out routine again to get myself through these winter months. And the scrapbooking has been revved up again. Just finished a New York one. Embarassed to tell you what year. He he. But it's a nice winter activity. 

My dad was incredible with all the things he did around the house. From helping Mark hang up the pot rack which I am in love with, to finding a spice rack drawer at Rona. He was the list king, fixing my desk that broke in the move, hanging up the towel rack in our bedroom bathroom, and doling out tons of knowledge from electrical work, to insulation, to how to clean out out "humidifier tubing". Not to mention getting a layout of the basement for future endeavors. Car batteries installed, broom racks hung, church bench put together, and fine tuning our house by painting our baseboards so that the nails and cracks are covered up and decreasing the length in the blind cords. It was lovely for him to come and see our house for the first time. I had a great time with you Daddio. 

Mom coming the second time around was still just as fun and fantastic.  Shopping for things needed for the house, decorative and functional (love my pillows). And just shopping too (she got an amazing sweater). Pulling out our iron and ironing board for the first time. He he, glad it's served one use so far. Seeing a movie, 'the book thief' and crying like a baby...thanks for that...he he (It was really good). Going to Zumba class and dancing like a fool. A serious fool that the instructor called out to me, 'that's right you are getting it'. And just chilling out watching movies at home. Not to mention all the help she was when it came to helping make big meals from vacuuming the house to helping prep food and after warm the food with towels. Mark and I have learned a few more things when it comes to socializing and having company, so thanks mom!

And the collaborative effort of both of them hanging up the curtains. From mom cutting and ironing on the hem to dad measuring out and hanging the rods and curtains. Really I have amazing parents and I am so grateful to all the help you gave us. The house feels so cozy and warm now. I feel content and that I can finally just live in it as little things are no longer hanging over my head.  Sure I have some ideas. But those are on the back burner for awhile. I just want to enjoy. And I hope that our house shows the personality of us shining through via pics, books, artwork, and furniture. 

I may show the results. But be patient. Need to actually take them. He he. 

Love

Lucky lady

I was a very lucky this year as I not only got to have my holidays with one side of my family, but both at the same time. And like Mark said it was a marathon, not a sprint, of wonderful holiday goodness that leaves my heart feeling happy. 

My parents came on Christmas Eve (and are still here till the ninth, eek). It was a perfect time as it broke my stretch of six shifts nicely and putting some fun into my days as they become pretty monotonous prior to work. Took a nice tour of Marks school. And the three of them had a Robertson family tradition of a tortiere that evening. I think they were pretty tired as they went to bed early. 

On the day of Christmas, I have already written about. It was wonderful and so much fun. I don't think it could have been any better although having Jimi and his partner would have been an added bonus. Not working too...but that provided me with another kind of joy. 

Mom got to continue on with her traditional Boxing Day trip with her friend. While Mark got to celebrate with all the Edey cousins in Red Deer. I got to sleep. It was appreciated. 

And then we contined celebrating Christmas with Jimi Jam and Cassie on the 27th.  Wendy and David came over and we did our first Christmas ever with excellent family help. Mark cooked the turkey. Amazingly. Dad did he escargots. And my fantastic mother did the rest although she states she really didn't. I was around for clean up and coordination...sure that's it. All in all it went well. Mom was great at it and knew that towels keep everything warm and made sure to get everything ready in the am leaving more time to socialize. Apparently it wasn't her first rodeo (wink, wink). I don't think it could have been done better with my husband and parents by my side. Next time we may try at it with no help....but is that as much fun as family involvement?

Family bonding was after with trips to see the Harry potter exhibit, see the hobbit desolation of smaug. Spillage of corn startch, and leftover turkey sandwhiches, costco runs and gym trips. Movies from the library and fChristmas, goodies galore and dad teachings about home repair, maintenace and electrical work. Laughs and love. 

A birthday celebration for my lovely. A feast of meat with wonderful company of family and friends that expressed numerous times that they wanted to celebrate Marks birthday, even if Mark didn't think it was a big deal. And we were all so glad to have them and our parents and siblings (that were in town). Definitlely beat last years Vegas debacle. 

And then New Years Eve where we visited with two parties so we could hang out with just some of the people we really love and appreciate. Ringing in the new year with laughs, fun and mice!

And you would think that would be it. But as Mark said, it is a marathon not a sprint. So we headed to Marks uncle and aunts for a dinner and one of my fav Edey traditions of Court Whist. So much fun. 

It is is back to work tomorrow but I can honestly say it has been an amazing holiday week this year. So very fortunate to have both families here and to spend time with them. It has been lovely. I am just grateful. 

Happy New Year!

2014 I am excited for the new beginnings and what is in store!

Love

Happy birthday my love

It is your birthday so to you happy birthday.

I know you never want to celebrate them. You don't want to make a big deal about the whole to do. And that is okay. But a tiny little celebration is good. Because, hey, we are all pretty damn happy you are here, in this world with us. That is the whole point of birthdays, isn't it. Celebrate you, your life so far and celebrate what's to come. Because if you weren't here, I think a great many of us would be terribly sad. 

You are such a fantastically awesome individual. You care so much. I see you do it everyday. 

- With your kids....they are so lucky to have you as a teacher. I think one of your students is right, "long live mark!" You care about them so much. Even when you have your Christmas break, you continuously think up ideas for what you can do to help them. 

- your parents...you love them and they love you. You call them whenever you have a chance. Invite them for dinner. Laugh and joke with them. Show up to their special events. I think you are a pretty good son and I think they would be inclined to agree

- my parents...hey, you are there favourite son in law. Always thinking of things to do, wanting to show them different things and make them different meals. Ready to host and to listen. And there to lend a helping hand when they need you to help with "the lists". He he. 

- yours (and mine) siblings....plus a special baby b. I think you care so much about their lives and want to make sure everyone is happy, and comfortable in every situation. Call them up randomly to make sure things are okay. You are there to boost a car, encourage little ones to play with their food, and making yourself available to help. You love them. And they know it.

- your friends...they love you, they love to trase you and you love to give it back. Your friends who are all so special and unique. They, like you, live hard and play hard (I swear one day you will all occupy one hospital with all your collective injuries....I hope I am not on shift). They talk politics, they are zany and fun. They are positive and happy. And you are so good to them. You listen, you provide thoughtful insight, and you laugh. I love your laugh. 

- finally me. You mean so much to me. I have enjoyed our adventures together. And we have had many. You are my cheerleader when I am down. You lift me up through words of encouragement and great hugs. You care about my feelings and listen to me. You know how to laugh. We can joke around very well...maybe too well. It may end in rough housing and a re-break of the toe. But it's worth it...he he. Okay maybe not and sorry about that. But to continue on you are thoughtful with your intentions. You love nature and life. And I love enjoying it with you. Basically I am happy we have shared our lives together so far. It's been pretty great!

So happy birthday lovely. Enjoy the day, in how you want to spend it. 

Love

Christmas at work

My first Christmas working. It was something that I knew was in my future as people don't stop getting ill but I didn't know what to expect. But I can tell you this. It was quite lovely. 

Sure I was working on my favourite time of year. But there were many things that helped make this Christmas truly memorable and truly special. 

1. My parents came in on day three of my rotation. An added bonus to break up the long stretches. So happy to see them as I was on countdown!

2. I worked evenings so I got my Christmas morning with my parents and husband. Spending three hours watching everyone unwrap and play with their toys. Santa was a good man!

3. We got to go to my amazing inlaws who made a Christmas brunch. Plus see an additional little "Santa" in Baby B. Hanging out with both families for me made it truly fantastic. 

4. I worked in a great team. The whole six days. Everyone wanting and willing to help each other out. Making a potluck dinner. Sharing laughs. Going over concerns. Fantastic. Plus I ended my stretch on Boxing Day rather than begin it  he he. 

5. Finally my patients. A feisty elderly woman who made my shift alone, with her plucky attitude and fantastic spunk. Giving me a fantastically hard time and me loving every minute of it. Another, true love in the older generation as one took care of another, celebrating a private Christmas in their room with such love and tenderness. Then seeing a patient I had before who was very very sick and now seems so much better (still sick) but so much better. Finally a story teller who would love to talk about her past. Each one special, unique and who I had the pleasure of spending Christmas with.

All of this made me all the more grateful and feeling the love this Christmas. 

Love

And then there were five.

Just as Mark's holidays begin, congratulations 'best teacher in the Edmonton public school board,' my days off end. A stretch of six is in my future and working on Christmas Day. I don't know what to think or expect from that. But I will do my best to make amends with it. 

But celebrations are still to be had, because the Christmas season is here! Our last Christmas party was yesterday but starting this Sunday, family celebrations begin. An anniversary celebration for my inlaws, AND my parents coming on Christmas Eve. I will, WILL it to go by slowly after that! So pumped!

So come on Christmas I am ready. Presents wrapped. Baking complete. Dinner fixings bought. House cleaned. Music playlists made. Tree lit. Advent calendar on countdown. Let the festivities begin!

Love

With 8 days left...

Till Christmas what does one do?

Make some Christmas treats, and make sure the "quality control" system is in place to taste test...Thank you Mark.

Read the multitude of Christmas cards received by friends and family and give thanks.

Watch 'White Christmas' and think of your Grampie because that is what I always do when I watch that movie.

Listen to Christmas music and dance around the kitchen because that just feels right.

Talk to parents that will be arriving in 7 short days. Eek!

Love

Weekend during the week day

Some of my days off aren't really productive and then there are others...

One day I get to witness a wonderful retirement tribute to my father in law down at city hall. 

Everyone making speeches of what a great worker he is, his devotion to public service and his positivity in the work place. 

Although I don't know how he is at work I would say he is like that at home. 

Always working hard, full of laughs, and making time for every member in his family. 

Then I got to go to my old job. 

See a performance of the nutcracker for their annual Christmas concert. 

Visit with some of my old clients

And talk with the nutcracker and Rat King themselves. 

Although I must say the Rat King spent most of his time asking for Mark, and kicking me. 

Merry Christmas in his own way.

Two days off well spent. 

Love

I love the smell of Christmas

Especially the smell of pine. 

And lucky me. 

Our house is infused with it. 

Love

Bicycle

The only sad thing about getting a bicycle in the winter is that it can't go outside. 

But the happy thing is it becomes a decoration in the living room. 

It becomes a peice of furniture. 

It is admired. 

And it is occasionally ridden in the house. 

Shhhh

Don't tell. 

Love

The fantastic, the bad and the ugly.

Let's get honest and real in this post. I had a bit of a trying week. And of all things it was a week off so what oh what is my problem. Honestly!

Well let's start off with the bad. 

I decided through some encouragement to throw a birthday party for myself. 

Bought all the food, prepared and laid it out, cleaned the house and because of the Christmas Twinkie in me decorated the house. 

Fourteen people were suppose to attend at eight pm. 

Then the calls came. And people started to cancel. 

And you know what? Everyone had a reasonable reason that they couldn't come. Sick children, just having a child and working late and then working early. 

no one could really blame them for not attending. 

But I may have had a silent pity party. Or was it silent? Ask Mark. 

Eight came. And then eight fifteen, eight thirty. 

I sat glumly on the couch and said to a very tired Mark who had a very long day, "I don't think anyone is coming". Tears may have rimmed my eyes. 

Mark grabbed his phone frantically texted my friends and figuring out their status. 

Eight forty, four of my wonderful friends came. Anita, Fraser, Ellen, and Jeff. 

They smiled and hugged me and sat around our kitchen table. 

Eating all the prepared food. 

Talking, debating, laughing, joking. 

And staying up till 1:30 am! 

Great company overall and so thrilled that four great people were able to come!

Then the ugly came. 

Mark called me at home two days prior to my actual birthday. 

He had to work a Christmas concert. 

I thought he may have been joking. 

He wasn't. 

Then he started to make plans of what to do. Rescheduling my day, inviting others to come, etc. 

I didn't want anything. 

He insisted. 

I got mad. 

Then he got mad. 

We were both mad. 

Lol. Sigh. A little known fact about me. I hate surprises. Ask my mom. I hate plans made re. me behind my back. I am just a plain old brat about it. Simple as that. Again ask my mom. 

After a breather there was resolution. 

And Mark may have been right (cough cough) that one shouldn't spend their birthday alone (Wow I can be stubborn and a tad dramatic. He he). 

Finally the fantastic. Because one should forget the bad and the ugly and concentrate on the full greatness, happiness, and the positive aspects of life. 

Seriously 

Mark had planned and made a birthday "lupper" for my family and I on Sunday. 

Wendy, David, Jimi and Cassie came by. 

We had gourmet French toast, bacon, orange juice, fruit and birthday cake and cinnamon buns for dessert. 

We chatted in the sitting room. 

I opened presents. 

It was lovely. 

I caught a movie, my choice on Saturday. 

Had movie popcorn and went to the fancy theatre. 

Fancy cupcakes with an I love you message another day. 

Got to spend a wonderful day with a little two year old at the world water park. 

Swimming. 

Then I got to laugh at her two year old self as she tormented my poor cat. 

Ran around the house rearranging all our things. 

And creating mischief climbing out of her crib, not napping, and watering the floor instead of the plants. 

Then lucky me. On my birthday got to spend the morning with the two year old's mom, Jeaninne and her week and a half year old sister. 

So sweet. 

Hot chocolate, doughnuts, baby cuddles, laughing at some funny memories and making new ones. 

It didn't end. 

Text messages, deliveries, emails, facebook messages, video messages and calls times three from my lovely parents. 

And Anita came. 

Took me out to a very awesome restaurant called rge road. 

And I continued to laugh, chat, and just hang out with one fantastic gal. 

Then my poor Mark, who worked a very long day waited up for us to come home. 

And presented me with a fabulous present. 

A bike that I have been wanting so badly but kept convincing myself that I don't need it. 

I know I am a spoiled brat. And I am supremely lucky to have a person in my life that puts up with my crap every now and then. And reassures me that things are okay. Concentrate on the positive and not to give up. Who likes my nuttiness and my birthday week even if he pretends not too. 

And to friends and family that laugh at my dramatic tales causing me to laugh about it and to give me a bit of perspective (but are smart enough to wait to tell me this, after I have calmed down). 

I am very lucky, grateful and yes I had a fantastic birthday (week). 

Love

Guess...

Who learned how to use a power drill. Muhahaha. Mark may wish he never let me in on the secret. The student may surpass the teacher. 

And the projects commence. 

Happy

The Christmas lights are up. 

And they look beautiful. 

And as Mark promised, he did it. 

No problems. 

Construing a device of a broom and hockey stick to get them on the branches. 

And I love them. 

And Mark being on a roll of awesomeness. 

Brought all the staff on my unit cupcakes and cookies. 

Because we were working on the night of the Christmas party. 

And proving to many others his awesomeness. 

Something that I know plenty about. 

Great times continue on. 

Love

This is what I know

I love Christmas, as most people know. 

I feel it's officially time to celebrate as even hotels are doing it. 

Outdoor lights are an essential thing to have. 

Especially when there is an epic amount of snow outside. 

I also know that I don't think it is in my capabilities to decorate the trees outside. 

As it was an epic fail the first time I tried. 

The lights froze and got stiff. 

They tangled up and started to unplug as I flailed them onto a tree. 

And because I wasn't tall enough I used a rake to move them up. 

But that resulted in branches breaking. 

Thus resulting in the first Christmas activity that I have not enjoyed. 

Let's just say there were tears and lights strewn on our living room floor. 

But a husband was there to assure that he will attempt on his own. 

A Christmas present for me. 

In this moment...

I am content. 

It is Christmas in November. 

The tree is decorated. 

The piano player is playing Christmas carols. 

I just had a holiday drink. 

Before I was in a hot pool, sauna, and steam room. 

I ordered room service and ate in bed. 

I read a book. 

I took a walk around the mountains. 

And I am with someone I love. 

Total brag post I know. But I truly am content and I must remember these moments too. 

Mr J.

There are days where I encounter ordinary people that I find extraordinary. 

One of these was Mr. J. I met Mr. J awhile ago. He was a older gentlemen with a tremor in his hands. On my first day with him, he laid in his bed as I took his vitals. I asked my questions and he replied in a shaky/slurred voice. I looked at him puzzled as I couldn't understand what he said. I asked again. And he replied again. 

Still unable to understand, I felt embarassed as I didn't want to intentionally make someone feel bad. Just as I was about to say that I wasn't making out his words I heard him clear as day, "Sorry, I don't speak very well." It just clicked. If I listened hard enough I could hear him. 

Immediately I dismissed the apology and redirected the focus. "We are going to figure things out together, if you can be patient with me". Agreement was made and ahead we went. 

I had him for a long stretch of shifts. I figured out his needs and realized although there were many things that he needed help with, it didn't feel like it. He required assistance feeding, transferring, going to the bathroom. But he was so eager to practice his independence that it felt like less. I was in awe of how empowered he was. 

I never had to be that person to hound him to do things. He would practice his exercises in his free time, doing his leg movements at the edge of his bed. He would do his hand stretches and feed himself to the best of his ability. On the contrary sometimes I had to set restrictions when I felt he was pushing it too far and his safety may be at risk, like a fall out of bed, or out of a chair. 

He may have looked really sick to many. But his enthusiasm and optimism made you feel that he was a-okay.  I told him one evening that I found his attitude infectious and so positive. He said "there are worse things that could have happened to him. And worse things happening to others. He is fine and happy to be alive." 

Moments like that make me grateful for the opportunity I have. People who put a smile on my face and put me in my place when I have those self loathing days. So thank you Mr. J. I am still thinking of you with enjoyment. Hope you are doing well!

I love a good weekend

Especially when it is spent with good friends. 

And when you get to see good music on top of it. 

Like the Dixie Chicks. 

Who were fantastic. Even if I was hoping for some sass. 

But seriously. Love the voice and the music

And then the fun weekend continues. 

With a birthday celebration for a special lady. 

Shopping, catching up and laughs were involved. 

Plus eating out and chatting some more. 

Then I return home to the falling (first) snowfall of the year. 

To watch rental movies with my husband. 

And to cosy up on the couch today and continue watching movies. 

Eat leftovers and have pie. 

Life is good. 

And needs to be savored. 

It's been a long week...

And it does keep going for a bit more.

I have been working quite a bit 

but have managed to have some nights and days off. 

Of them I have laughed. 

And laughed hard. 

Like when my significant other texted a friend. 

And started smack talking in a joking way. 

To find out that it was the wrong number,

Through a FaceTime chat. 

And of others I have cried. 

Wallowing a bit in self pity. 

But having my significant other listen to me. 

Hug me. 

And then attempt (and sort of) succeed 

in snapping me out. 

And then I have felt content. 

Having heart to heart talks with friends. 

Soaking in laughter and fun at a party. 

Enjoying dinner and brunch with family. 

Spending time alone watching movies,

Snuggled amongst blankets. 

I have a pretty grand life. And pretty grand people in it. 

I am lucky. And we are going to have a lot of fun!

Love

When life gives you pie....

When your day is long and really kind of sucks, buy yourself a huge pumpkin pie from Costco and eat every delicious ounce of troubles away. That's right. Every bit. And not once will you think it's bad for you!

Basketball fun

My cousin Kathryn was in town. So exciting to see her as it has been a couple of years. So what did that entail? A family dinner of course. Jimi and Cassie came by for a simple dinner with Egg Nog (Mark may have bulked up after thanksgiving. He he). And salmon, rice asparagus and caprese salad. Yum.

Then we heading to the u of a pandas basketball game against the varsity reds of unb. Coincidentally one of Kathryn's friends was here this weekend too, assistant coaching unb. Exciting.

So me and basketball never really mixed. Mainly cause the team sport thing I was never great at, lack of coordination and all. But going with this crew was quite fun:

- Mark intensely watching the game, chewing gum. Asking him what kind of coach he is and he said deadpanned,"I am the one yelling all the time, whether they are listening or not" (like the unb coach). This put Jimi and me in a fit of laughter. 

- Cassie making little mistake re. the game stating period, goal much to Jimi's dismay. I could totally relate Cassie. 

- Jimi making comments like, "this is intense, I want to get in there," and "get it in the hole!" As we cheered for unb really loud creating the fans for u of a to cheer louder. Too funny. 

- making word of the day, "buxom"

- having blizzards, yum 

- being with family and laughing about your family. 

 

Wonderful visit

Love

Thanksgiving

I am one lucky lady. Yes I did work all weekend and yes it was evening and yes I realize others had thanksgiving dinner while I was working. But guess what? I still got a celebration. 

On Saturday morning we went over to Wendy and David's for a thanksgiving lunch with Lawrence. I got to watch how to bacon aficionados cook bacon in two very different ways. Be warned to stay away from the kitchen as tongs may be used as weapons. I enjoyed gluten free waffles that tasted fabulous. And I got to have pumpkin pie for dessert. And I love pumpkin pie!

I then attempted to make another pie this weekend, a pumpkin on as I have said before I love it! But on thanksgiving Monday after I finished work I realized I forgot to buy some key ingredients. So off to the store again. Ahh. And pie made.  Even if I forgot again to double the recipe and the pumpkin filling was a little thin. He he. 

Then my long lost brother came for dinner tonight. We facetimed my parents and shared laughs and stories. We vegged on the couch like you would after a big meal (of chicken and potatoes). We joked and watched tv. 

Grateful

Love

Where have I been?

New York. Yes I think it is official. I have a slight obsession with that city. I love it. Everything about it. I don't know if I ever want to live there, but visiting is fantastic...maybe yearly...or at least every two years?  He he he.

This time around I went with Anita. Anita was not the type of traveller I thought she would be. At least when it came to New York. She wasn't interested in seeing every sight you could. Instead she wanted to shop and see plays. A girl after my own heart. 

So that is what we did. Shop. We, visited my favourite toy store, FAO Schwartz, where Anita made her sister a muppet....so exciting. And I enjoyed all the big candy. Too bad my suitcase wasn't big enough. We then trekked to Dylan's candy store to ogle at all the other wonderful sweet treats. And I may have dragged Anita to the M&M store to bulk up on coconut, raspberry and mint M&M's. 

 After the sugar coma we treated ourselves to some fantastic plays. Book of Mormon, controversial yet amusing. Avenue Q the anti-Sesame Street with puppets and hilarious songs. And my personal fav. Newsies. My favourite musical as a preteen come to life on the stage with fantastic dancing, songs and sets. Loved it. I may have danced all night....and the morning....and the afternoon....AND on the plane.

It wasn't all plays and shopping. We did check out Central Park on a beautiful 24 degree day. Performers, comedians, boat rides and baseball games all around. I love that place. So quiet in the middle of a big city. Along the walk (as that is the only way we got around, minus one water taxi ride) was grand central station, Madison square park, the flat iron building, the Statue of Liberty, the freedom tower, ellis island, St Patricks cathedral, the intrepid, Brooklyn bridge, Rockefeller square, Times Square, Macy's, Empire State Building and my fav the top of the rock at night. 

We did eat too. Sushi at Tao, Maine lobster at db bistro, pasta galore along restaurant row, Thai, pizza, pretzels, hot dogs, and Indian. Plus red velvet cupcakes, coconut cake...Yum.

And a visit to Hoboken, New Jersey to visit Carlos Bakery from Cake Boss. Sidenote for fans of the show. You will probably enjoy this. And props to giving front of the line service to locals as they are your loyal customers. Personally it will only be a one time visit for me. The wait was excruciating and I think with the amount of money probably made by them (we were seeing orders of approx. 50-100 $ a customer), they could organize a bit better and employ a few more. But the cannolis were amazing! But I digress....

All and all a fantastic holiday. With a bit of apartment madness from our renter as the neighbour complained about him and we may have received a subpoena on his behalf. But the place was what it was suppose to be minus those little hitches. Ha ha. 

And Anita was a great traveller. For a girl that has her camera always ready it was refreshing to watch Anita just take things in. She would pull out the camera every once in awhile but really liked to just look around and watch. Take in the memories. It was nice. And she was sympathetic to my struggles as I was having a bit of GI and cold issues the day before and a couple of days in (Sidenote I seem to always get sick a couple of days prior to leaving New York. All three times. Weird). Good times with a good girlfriend.

Overall I am grateful.